Met a guy at a bar, should I initiate anything?

Had my mix of good and terrible men, but I know if you meet someone at the bar then go to a motel with friends and hookup, it's just for the sex.

However the guy asked for my IG through one of my friends cause he was too shy to ask me directly, and we've talked for a while and the age gap is 1-2 years.( I'm 22. )He'd ask me about my day, but it seems like the convo is dry? In person it wasn't though. We'd laugh and talk alot, so I'm thinking he's just not great at chatting. He was really sweet and cuddly, always asking me for consent and even kissed me to wake me up, saying he had to leave the night we met and slept together.

He did send me a few vids of him hanging out with friends, and then hasn't messaged anymore. He does heart react to my IG story a few times.

Should I man up and initiate the convo sometimes instead? People say you should let him do the effort, or to not chase, and I'm just not sure what to do? I have come from relationships where I was always putting in the effort 100%.

He works, so I just brush it off as maybe he's busy, then again idk. I'm just getting back into the dating pool, so it's a whirlwind of emotions lol.

He has hinted that "You never know, I could come with you" when I told him I'd love to try out various street foods here, and he was visibly upset when he found out I was leaving the country next year after graduation. (His friend came in the room the morning after we slept together, and right away he said "She's leaving the country next year" with a sad tone)



Submitted March 06, 2023 at 12:15AM

Had my mix of good and terrible men, but I know if you meet someone at the bar then go to a motel with friends and hookup, it's just for the sex.However the guy asked for my IG through one of my friends cause he was too shy to ask me directly, and we've talked for a while and the age gap is 1-2 years.( I'm 22. )He'd ask me about my day, but it seems like the convo is dry? In person it wasn't though. We'd laugh and talk alot, so I'm thinking he's just not great at chatting. He was really sweet and cuddly, always asking me for consent and even kissed me to wake me up, saying he had to leave the night we met and slept together.He did send me a few vids of him hanging out with friends, and then hasn't messaged anymore. He does heart react to my IG story a few times.Should I man up and initiate the convo sometimes instead? People say you should let him do the effort, or to not chase, and I'm just not sure what to do? I have come from relationships where I was always putting in the effort 100%.He works, so I just brush it off as maybe he's busy, then again idk. I'm just getting back into the dating pool, so it's a whirlwind of emotions lol.He has hinted that "You never know, I could come with you" when I told him I'd love to try out various street foods here, and he was visibly upset when he found out I was leaving the country next year after graduation. (His friend came in the room the morning after we slept together, and right away he said "She's leaving the country next year" with a sad tone)
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