How can I [20M] progress a relationship with a girl I’m dating [20F]?

A couple months ago, I started talking to this girl in my class who I sit next to. We got along well, so I asked her out and she said yes. Both of us are pretty shy so progress has been slow, but we’ve been on like 2 or 3 dates now, in addition to seeing each other twice a week in class.

Neither of us have any prior relationship experience. On our last date, we established that we both like each other and want to continue going out. I guess my main problem is that I don’t know how to make any progress from here. Even though she said she likes me and keeps agreeing to go out with me, it feels like she’s not putting in a whole lot of effort. I’ve been the one to plan every date, it’s usually me who initiates conversation, etc. I also haven’t had any opportunities to kiss her, though she might not be ready for that. And she declined my offer to pick her up for our last date.

My main concern is just getting into a boring routine where we keep going out to dinner or a movie or whatever, we have a good time but there’s no escalation, rinse and repeat. I don’t want things to stagnate, but I’ve never made it this far into dating someone before, so I’m completely lost. Is there some way I can get her to put a bit more effort into progressing things? I’d at least like to know that she’s just as interested in me as I am in her, so that I know I’m not wasting my time.

I know inviting her over is an option, but my living situation isn’t ideal to have anyone over. I guess I just have to wait for her to invite me to her apartment instead, but it doesn’t seem like that’s gonna happen any time soon.

tl;dr Been out with a girl a few times now. We both like each other, but I’m not sure how to make any further progress. I haven’t had the chance to kiss her, and it feels like it’ll get boring soon if we just keep going on dates where nothing really happens.



Submitted November 17, 2022 at 12:15AM

A couple months ago, I started talking to this girl in my class who I sit next to. We got along well, so I asked her out and she said yes. Both of us are pretty shy so progress has been slow, but we’ve been on like 2 or 3 dates now, in addition to seeing each other twice a week in class.Neither of us have any prior relationship experience. On our last date, we established that we both like each other and want to continue going out. I guess my main problem is that I don’t know how to make any progress from here. Even though she said she likes me and keeps agreeing to go out with me, it feels like she’s not putting in a whole lot of effort. I’ve been the one to plan every date, it’s usually me who initiates conversation, etc. I also haven’t had any opportunities to kiss her, though she might not be ready for that. And she declined my offer to pick her up for our last date.My main concern is just getting into a boring routine where we keep going out to dinner or a movie or whatever, we have a good time but there’s no escalation, rinse and repeat. I don’t want things to stagnate, but I’ve never made it this far into dating someone before, so I’m completely lost. Is there some way I can get her to put a bit more effort into progressing things? I’d at least like to know that she’s just as interested in me as I am in her, so that I know I’m not wasting my time.I know inviting her over is an option, but my living situation isn’t ideal to have anyone over. I guess I just have to wait for her to invite me to her apartment instead, but it doesn’t seem like that’s gonna happen any time soon.tl;dr Been out with a girl a few times now. We both like each other, but I’m not sure how to make any further progress. I haven’t had the chance to kiss her, and it feels like it’ll get boring soon if we just keep going on dates where nothing really happens.
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