/u/Mr_Zebra on Asexuality and telling the family

I totally understand that too. People I was in secondary school or college for example, plenty are either in long term relationships or married, or with kids. And like you, I had the same feelings of "Oh shit, there's everyone being adult and doing adult things like lots of sex and baby manufacturing!" But you know what? I'm OK with that now, cos I know who I am.

I remember seeing the posters for "40 Year Old Virgin" when I was 17, and even then I knew I was "different" from everyone else around me, I just didn't know that something like asexuality existed. I went "Oh shit, that's going to me, I'm going to be the 40 Year Old Virgin!" But now I'm at the stage in my life where I understand my asexuality, and I don't feel shame anymore because I never had sex, and never will.

I never had to go through what you're going through though, cos my family never badgered me about it. "Why don't you have a girlfriend yet?!" Immediate family I think just quietly accepted that I am not the romantic type, and the extended family just consider me somewhat weird. I'm very new to talking online in ace communities, but some of the stories I've read break my heart, and yours is one of them.

What you do in the end is up to you. I do think it'll be hard for you to tell them, but the hope is that once you tell them and it's out there, your family will get off your back and hopefully start to understand you.





June 26, 2021 at 11:34PM
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