/u/tired-chemist on I made a mistake.

If someone decides there will be a "next time" for sex despite you telling them in no uncertain terms that there won't be one, RUN. If he doesn't respect your sexuality and expects that he'll be able to coerce you again, that's a huge red flag and you should ditch him entirely. I know it's hard and scary, but if he's making you uncomfortable and you're scared to be drunk around him, he's not your friend, he's a predator. Friends respect boundaries. Friends respect you saying no. Friends don't try and convince you to do sexual acts that make you uncomfortable and scared to be alone with them. It's hard to make friends as an adult, sure, but that doesn't mean you have to settle for someone who sees you as an opportunity to get what he wants

You, meanwhile, didn't do anything wrong. You were drunk, and someone took advantage of the fact that you couldn't say no in that state. That doesn't mean you've fucked up. The blame is in the person who takes advantage, not the person taken advantage of. Be kind to yourself as much as you can. You might start feeling some pretty intense emotions about what happened or you might not. Either way, understand that you are not at fault. You didn't bring this on yourself either intentionally or by accident. You deserve love, kindness, acceptance, and respect. You deserve good friends who will be able to give you those things. I'm here for you if you need to talk





May 17, 2021 at 11:47PM
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