/u/thenefariousellie on How did someone react to you telling them that you're asexual?

I have identified as ace/asexual for 6-7years now. (Recently accepting that I am demi, but still going by ace as a segway into a full explanation of demisexuality, if I feel the other person is willing to listen & learn...)

I only explicitly told 2 people I was interested in that I was ace.

The first person completely invalidated it with the usual anti-asexual comments and tried to push my boundaries. It was so hurtful and while I'm glad I left that situation, I still haven't fully recovered from that experience...

The second person was a little more understanding (they identify as LGBTQIA+, so that was a common ground for us to talk about our identities and experiences). And the further we got into our relationship, I realized that I might actually be demi and told them so. They were happy for me that I came closer to my own truth. (But the relationship dynamics changed since then, which brought on those doubting feelings from past experiences. I'm still recovering from it while accepting my demi-ness.)

I shared my story a bit in a different discussion thread in this subreddit. But yeah, those two instances were polar opposites and happened within the same year...!





August 04, 2020 at 11:23PM
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