Friend wants more

Okay so I need some advice, last year I went on 3 dates with this guy and I didn't think he was for me so I ended it. He asked if we could be friends because he doesn't have very many female friends. I was sure okay because he seems like a nice guy (always keeping in the back of my mind, that he most likely would put the moves on me at some point). Anyway, we continued hanging out and everything is normal and fine. He's hot, nice, very smart, loyal, and all these things, but throughout our friendship I could tell that he wasn't always honest with me because he was trying to impress me and feed me bullshit that he thought it's what I wanted to hear. For me, that's a turn off, because it feels like someone's lying to me and trying to manipulate the situation (also how dumb do you think I am). I never called him out on it, but I deinitely noted the manipulation and the sneakiness and the little lies (I think he just thinks he's smartest guy in the room). Not long ago, somehow I gave the impression that I wanted more and I wont lie every once and a while I have contemplated it but the little sneakiness, manipulation and lies have always held me back from giving it a shot to the point where I couldn't imagine kissing the guy at some points (even though I know he's just trying to impress me) because I never feel like I was getting a full sense of who he actually is. Anyway, over the summer he finally put the moves on me at his place and I was honestly caught a bit off guard because I wasn't expecting the night to end that way. Since we were drinking, I slept in his guest room and basically told him I would think about it. The following morning, I was getting dressed and he has a whiteboard in his guest room with a "to due list' and on the board it said "Return shirt I stole from drug store". Clearly he doesn't have many guests because why would he leave that up there? Now, I don't know what the story is behind that and Im not going to ask but he's basically waiting on my reply to see if I want to try for more or not. I'm leaning towards "no" because of the reasons I listed above. Is this the right decision or am I being too hard on the guy? He's 28 by the way.



Submitted December 31, 2019 at 11:54PM

Okay so I need some advice, last year I went on 3 dates with this guy and I didn't think he was for me so I ended it. He asked if we could be friends because he doesn't have very many female friends. I was sure okay because he seems like a nice guy (always keeping in the back of my mind, that he most likely would put the moves on me at some point). Anyway, we continued hanging out and everything is normal and fine. He's hot, nice, very smart, loyal, and all these things, but throughout our friendship I could tell that he wasn't always honest with me because he was trying to impress me and feed me bullshit that he thought it's what I wanted to hear. For me, that's a turn off, because it feels like someone's lying to me and trying to manipulate the situation (also how dumb do you think I am). I never called him out on it, but I deinitely noted the manipulation and the sneakiness and the little lies (I think he just thinks he's smartest guy in the room). Not long ago, somehow I gave the impression that I wanted more and I wont lie every once and a while I have contemplated it but the little sneakiness, manipulation and lies have always held me back from giving it a shot to the point where I couldn't imagine kissing the guy at some points (even though I know he's just trying to impress me) because I never feel like I was getting a full sense of who he actually is. Anyway, over the summer he finally put the moves on me at his place and I was honestly caught a bit off guard because I wasn't expecting the night to end that way. Since we were drinking, I slept in his guest room and basically told him I would think about it. The following morning, I was getting dressed and he has a whiteboard in his guest room with a "to due list' and on the board it said "Return shirt I stole from drug store". Clearly he doesn't have many guests because why would he leave that up there? Now, I don't know what the story is behind that and Im not going to ask but he's basically waiting on my reply to see if I want to try for more or not. I'm leaning towards "no" because of the reasons I listed above. Is this the right decision or am I being too hard on the guy? He's 28 by the way.

Comments

Popular posts from this blog

The difference between being right and being understood

My (27f) gf (27f) is getting tired of me not sharing intimate/ personal info about me

My (23M) girlfriend (25F) relationship is confusing to me. I might be the problem, or maybe we are just incompatible.