Difficulty dating

So some context first. Australian, male, 24 soon. I struggle with dating. I've been on a single date this year with a repeat customer at the place I work at (mistake learnt. Don't date customers).

I've read over loads of advice however I haven't acted on much of it. In my head, the whole 'join a community' thing could work but I don't think so based on the following.

I'm far better one on one than in groups. I'm getting the attention I want (again, problem I know) and it's easier to keep the conversation going and making it great. In groups, I'm the timid one. Quiet, reserved and no one pays attention to me (I'm basing this on my observations, which I'm totally aware are limites). Being timid has also stopped me from asking out women in the past (not entirely, I was adventurous about a month ago with one woman (asking her if I could give her my number), but she had a boyfriend already).

Dating apps could work, however I've had poor luck with them in the past. I believe I put too much focus on my bio that my photos (or lack there of) miss out. I think I'm decent looking face wise, but I'm overweight which is only my fault.

I'm also too timid to ask my friends for help in this regard. They've offered a few times and I highly doubt they'd say no, but it's one area I've struggled with. (I have some trust issues based on life to this point. But I think that's the majority of people. Again. My problem to work through).

I'm not really sure what I'm asking for here. I suppose one thing could be speaking up in groups without being the egocentric or 'all about me' guy. The other could be 'what are women looking for?'. Perhaps the last question would be 'am I obsessing with this too much?'.

Submitted August 12, 2023 at 12:05AM

So some context first. Australian, male, 24 soon. I struggle with dating. I've been on a single date this year with a repeat customer at the place I work at (mistake learnt. Don't date customers).I've read over loads of advice however I haven't acted on much of it. In my head, the whole 'join a community' thing could work but I don't think so based on the following.I'm far better one on one than in groups. I'm getting the attention I want (again, problem I know) and it's easier to keep the conversation going and making it great. In groups, I'm the timid one. Quiet, reserved and no one pays attention to me (I'm basing this on my observations, which I'm totally aware are limites). Being timid has also stopped me from asking out women in the past (not entirely, I was adventurous about a month ago with one woman (asking her if I could give her my number), but she had a boyfriend already).Dating apps could work, however I've had poor luck with them in the past. I believe I put too much focus on my bio that my photos (or lack there of) miss out. I think I'm decent looking face wise, but I'm overweight which is only my fault.I'm also too timid to ask my friends for help in this regard. They've offered a few times and I highly doubt they'd say no, but it's one area I've struggled with. (I have some trust issues based on life to this point. But I think that's the majority of people. Again. My problem to work through).I'm not really sure what I'm asking for here. I suppose one thing could be speaking up in groups without being the egocentric or 'all about me' guy. The other could be 'what are women looking for?'. Perhaps the last question would be 'am I obsessing with this too much?'.