/u/EntireSunset on In a relationship and struggling

I am so sorry to hear that you feel broken. First of all, I think there is no "normal" amount of sex to want or need. That is always up to the individual couple to determine and to compromise.

Secondly, does your partner know how you are feeling and what you are thinking about? Have they expressed to you that they are hurt? If so, what did they say what exactly hurts them?

Thirdly, it is completely okay to not know what or who you are just yet. We have all been there and I am still at the point of questioning myself every once in a while. That is part of my life I would say. Just because your experiences dont align with "typical ace experiences" doesnt have to mean that you cannot be ace. Asexuality is a spectrum and there are so many different ace experiences. And saying that you dont like sex very often and find it boring or see it as a chore sometimes, is something that a lot of aces can relate to in one way or another. So even if in the end you find out that the ace label doesnt fit to describe your experiences you might still find some common ground with other aces and can benefit from talking to other aces :)

Lastly, I can totally understand not being ready to share this already with your friends. You are completely welcome to share your experiences here and the community will try to help you answer your questions :)

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I hope that my reply maybe already helped a bit. You are definitely not alone with your worries. I am sorry to hear you feel like the problem, cause you defintiely are not. You are a wonderful and valid human being. <3





June 16, 2023 at 11:16PM
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