Too busy to date after seemingly good second date

After seeing a girl a couple times and arranging a third date, I suddenly got a text saying that she didn’t want to waste my time as she’s too busy with exams and life to properly date at the moment. She said that come summer (in a couple months) she’d be keen to try again and go on another after her exams, but I wasn’t sure if this was just being polite.

I’ve been on a lot of dates and had a lot of rejections too in the past. This felt a bit different. I’m at a point in my life where I feel really confident in who I am, and have a better sense of self esteem than I’ve ever previously felt. I went on two dates with this girl, and I felt like we had a genuine connection - we shared laughter and stories, and it felt so easy-going and natural. After the first date, I texted her saying I had fun and she agreed. We swiftly arranged a second date and had a similarly good experience. Both dates only lasted a couple of hours as she always had plans afterwards, so it always felt like they could’ve progressed more. After we met we exchanged texts and organised a third date. Her replies varied between being really fast and spontaneous, and slow and somewhat ambivalent. When we were face to face it felt genuine and fun.

This has left me feeling confused, but above all, sad. Is someone ever just too busy to date? Might this person just have been caught at the wrong time? I told her it’s cool and to message me if she does fancy trying it again in the future. Should I have been more upfront about how I felt? Am I reading too much into the situation and just take it at face value? Do I just treat it as a polite rejection and try to move on? When girls have rejected me before they’d never bother to suggest a future date , and I know I wouldn’t myself. What are your thoughts?

Sorry for the dump of questions, I just care a bit more this time.



Submitted April 22, 2023 at 12:12AM

After seeing a girl a couple times and arranging a third date, I suddenly got a text saying that she didn’t want to waste my time as she’s too busy with exams and life to properly date at the moment. She said that come summer (in a couple months) she’d be keen to try again and go on another after her exams, but I wasn’t sure if this was just being polite.I’ve been on a lot of dates and had a lot of rejections too in the past. This felt a bit different. I’m at a point in my life where I feel really confident in who I am, and have a better sense of self esteem than I’ve ever previously felt. I went on two dates with this girl, and I felt like we had a genuine connection - we shared laughter and stories, and it felt so easy-going and natural. After the first date, I texted her saying I had fun and she agreed. We swiftly arranged a second date and had a similarly good experience. Both dates only lasted a couple of hours as she always had plans afterwards, so it always felt like they could’ve progressed more. After we met we exchanged texts and organised a third date. Her replies varied between being really fast and spontaneous, and slow and somewhat ambivalent. When we were face to face it felt genuine and fun.This has left me feeling confused, but above all, sad. Is someone ever just too busy to date? Might this person just have been caught at the wrong time? I told her it’s cool and to message me if she does fancy trying it again in the future. Should I have been more upfront about how I felt? Am I reading too much into the situation and just take it at face value? Do I just treat it as a polite rejection and try to move on? When girls have rejected me before they’d never bother to suggest a future date , and I know I wouldn’t myself. What are your thoughts?Sorry for the dump of questions, I just care a bit more this time.
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