People who have fallen in love with their long time best friends, how did it work out for you?

I (she/her 20) have been best friends with this guy (he/him 20) for over 8 years. At the start, I had a childhood crush on him but then it just grew into a friendship. We've been a constant in each other's lives: watching each other get in and out of relationships, going to college and helping each other through rough patches.

Since the pandemic, we've been hanging out a lot more with different groups of friends. It's been fun! But the more I spend time with him, the more I'm developing deeper feelings. It's a feeling I have never felt with anyone else. Every moment with him just makes me feel content. I adore listening to his passions, thoughts on life and laughing at the stupidest shit. Needless to say, I have fell for him. Hard. (I could ramble about this but I'd like to keep this post short haha)

I can't tell if he likes me that way or not. Our friend group has a lot of girls, so I cant tell if he is just being friendly. He has drunkenly said "I love you" to me- but again it was with other friends so I'm not relying heavily on that incident.

I've been weighing my pros and cons to confess to him for the past year and have yet to come up with a decision. I'd love to confess to him, but there is a risk of ruining an 8 year long friendship. At the same time, if I don't tell him, I'm afraid I will miss my chance of anything ever happening.

I'd like to hear other people's experiences with this, and the outcomes (or any advice really!) Maybe it'll encourage me to make the move.

TL;DR I'm in love with my best friend of 8 years. What do?



Submitted December 24, 2022 at 08:22PM

I (she/her 20) have been best friends with this guy (he/him 20) for over 8 years. At the start, I had a childhood crush on him but then it just grew into a friendship. We've been a constant in each other's lives: watching each other get in and out of relationships, going to college and helping each other through rough patches.Since the pandemic, we've been hanging out a lot more with different groups of friends. It's been fun! But the more I spend time with him, the more I'm developing deeper feelings. It's a feeling I have never felt with anyone else. Every moment with him just makes me feel content. I adore listening to his passions, thoughts on life and laughing at the stupidest shit. Needless to say, I have fell for him. Hard. (I could ramble about this but I'd like to keep this post short haha)I can't tell if he likes me that way or not. Our friend group has a lot of girls, so I cant tell if he is just being friendly. He has drunkenly said "I love you" to me- but again it was with other friends so I'm not relying heavily on that incident.I've been weighing my pros and cons to confess to him for the past year and have yet to come up with a decision. I'd love to confess to him, but there is a risk of ruining an 8 year long friendship. At the same time, if I don't tell him, I'm afraid I will miss my chance of anything ever happening.I'd like to hear other people's experiences with this, and the outcomes (or any advice really!) Maybe it'll encourage me to make the move.TL;DR I'm in love with my best friend of 8 years. What do?
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