Dating someone who is avoiding you

When you first start dating, you might have a lot in common. You’re both into the same things and you find it hard to break up with them often as you would like.

But when you feel avoided in your relationship, it can be difficult getting to the truth about why. How do you cope when someone is avoiding and hurting your feelings?

Most of the time, we avoid people because they’re not going to change our minds about anything and won’t solve our problems. In other words, they aren’t worth our time or attention. So what we do, do we just keep ignoring them and hoping for the best? It doesn’t always work that way. Sometimes people just need a cup of tea, a word of advice and some space in their lives.

It’s easy to feel freaked out – First, you probably don’t know why they’re avoiding you because there’s no obvious reason. You’re going to start thinking that they’re rejecting you because they don’t want to be in a relationship with you. You’re afraid they’ll say things you either don’t want to hear or do. You’re going to start wondering if you should even bother dating people in the first place because you’re an amazing person who needs to be taken seriously.

You’re afraid to ask for an explanation – When you feel like you don’t know why someone is avoiding you, it can be really helpful to ask. It might sound silly, but ask your partner if they’re avoiding you. If they say, ask them why and see if you can get a tangible response. If they say that they’re avoiding you because you’re a difficult person to get along with, ask them why and see what else they’re afraid of saying or doing. You might just be able to get some insight into the issue and get a different answer.

Perspective – You're afraid to tell your partner why you're avoiding them because when you do, you’re probably going to sound like an ass. You’re probably going to sound like you’re lying or that you’re avoiding them because they didn’t do something nice enough or they’re worthless. It’s easy to feel like you need to get back at the person because they’ve done something bad to you.

Step up your communication – it can go a long way toward improving your relationship. However, communication can be challenging for those who are struggling. Especially when there’s an issue at hand that requires your full attention. Being avoidant is not an excuse for not trying. When things are not going well, it can lead to other negative effects and higher chances of separation.

But what are you doing wrong? What can you do about this? If you don’t trust yourself not to react when they avoid you, you’re almost guaranteed to start a fight. This is normal, it will happen, you'll start wondering but don’t stress about it. This may sound like a cold and hard rule to some, but it’s a really good idea to do this because it will help you avoid getting in over your head. Make sure you’re keeping it together during the dating process, and don’t lose your nerve when someone is avoiding you.

Submitted October 25, 2022 at 12:12AM

When you first start dating, you might have a lot in common. You’re both into the same things and you find it hard to break up with them often as you would like.But when you feel avoided in your relationship, it can be difficult getting to the truth about why. How do you cope when someone is avoiding and hurting your feelings?Most of the time, we avoid people because they’re not going to change our minds about anything and won’t solve our problems. In other words, they aren’t worth our time or attention. So what we do, do we just keep ignoring them and hoping for the best? It doesn’t always work that way. Sometimes people just need a cup of tea, a word of advice and some space in their lives.It’s easy to feel freaked out – First, you probably don’t know why they’re avoiding you because there’s no obvious reason. You’re going to start thinking that they’re rejecting you because they don’t want to be in a relationship with you. You’re afraid they’ll say things you either don’t want to hear or do. You’re going to start wondering if you should even bother dating people in the first place because you’re an amazing person who needs to be taken seriously.You’re afraid to ask for an explanation – When you feel like you don’t know why someone is avoiding you, it can be really helpful to ask. It might sound silly, but ask your partner if they’re avoiding you. If they say, ask them why and see if you can get a tangible response. If they say that they’re avoiding you because you’re a difficult person to get along with, ask them why and see what else they’re afraid of saying or doing. You might just be able to get some insight into the issue and get a different answer.Perspective – You're afraid to tell your partner why you're avoiding them because when you do, you’re probably going to sound like an ass. You’re probably going to sound like you’re lying or that you’re avoiding them because they didn’t do something nice enough or they’re worthless. It’s easy to feel like you need to get back at the person because they’ve done something bad to you.Step up your communication – it can go a long way toward improving your relationship. However, communication can be challenging for those who are struggling. Especially when there’s an issue at hand that requires your full attention. Being avoidant is not an excuse for not trying. When things are not going well, it can lead to other negative effects and higher chances of separation.But what are you doing wrong? What can you do about this? If you don’t trust yourself not to react when they avoid you, you’re almost guaranteed to start a fight. This is normal, it will happen, you'll start wondering but don’t stress about it. This may sound like a cold and hard rule to some, but it’s a really good idea to do this because it will help you avoid getting in over your head. Make sure you’re keeping it together during the dating process, and don’t lose your nerve when someone is avoiding you.