Never had a relationship, and don't know how to move forward

I (21M) have never had a real relationship. Came close once or twice, but mutually decided that we weren't as compatible as we thought. Whatever, it happens. I'm not exactly a pushy person. In fact, a large reason why I never had a relationship in high school was because I was always too anxious to ask girls out. But this has been the single biggest reason for a decline in mental health over the last several years. I am happy in every other aspect of my life except for this.

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I know it's picky, but the most important thing to me in my relationship is having someone who will rock climb with me. That said, climbing is male-dominated, and the girls in the climbing club at my college are either already in a relationship or not interested.

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I recently met someone at a climbing gym recently, and have been talking with her. But she takes literally days to respond. I figure this is because she is graduating. So benefit of the doubt. But when I was talking to her in person yesterday during a club meeting, she didn't make eye contact at all while she was talking except for maybe 1 or 2 glances. She was the first person in a while I've been interested in.

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My problem is that I am simply not interested in anyone outside of climbing. I can't help it though. I want to have a relationship, to the point that it's honestly the biggest thing keeping me unhappy.

Submitted May 08, 2022 at 12:09AM

I (21M) have never had a real relationship. Came close once or twice, but mutually decided that we weren't as compatible as we thought. Whatever, it happens. I'm not exactly a pushy person. In fact, a large reason why I never had a relationship in high school was because I was always too anxious to ask girls out. But this has been the single biggest reason for a decline in mental health over the last several years. I am happy in every other aspect of my life except for this.​I know it's picky, but the most important thing to me in my relationship is having someone who will rock climb with me. That said, climbing is male-dominated, and the girls in the climbing club at my college are either already in a relationship or not interested.​I recently met someone at a climbing gym recently, and have been talking with her. But she takes literally days to respond. I figure this is because she is graduating. So benefit of the doubt. But when I was talking to her in person yesterday during a club meeting, she didn't make eye contact at all while she was talking except for maybe 1 or 2 glances. She was the first person in a while I've been interested in.​My problem is that I am simply not interested in anyone outside of climbing. I can't help it though. I want to have a relationship, to the point that it's honestly the biggest thing keeping me unhappy.