saying he wants to do stuff, but then doesn't

Hi all, I'm a mid 30s female and I've been talking to this guy also in his 30s, for a few weeks. We initially met on a dating app, and I told him I'm leaving town in a few months for school. He then said it wouldn't make sense to date if I'm leaving, but he could go for some friendship. So I said fine.But when I'd say I would like to do X, he'd just say he's too tired.

Then I told him it wasn't working out, sorry. He said to me that he's sorry, but he still very much wants to hang. I then said that lately I've had some more time on my hands, but I'd just go do more work and busy myself. And he said that basically he'd be willing to take some of that time off of my hands and to reach out to him, but he's just not available "all the time." So fine, I said.

Fast forward to a few days later, I said I would be willing to go for a hike on the weekend, and no response. I frankly feel I'm being led on as a backup option in case he's super bored and some chick doesn't want him atm.

I wonder what I should say to him, I just feel like being really frank with him. I'm leaving I feel like I have nothing to lose in a way since I'm going out of town long-term.



Submitted April 02, 2022 at 12:15AM

Hi all, I'm a mid 30s female and I've been talking to this guy also in his 30s, for a few weeks. We initially met on a dating app, and I told him I'm leaving town in a few months for school. He then said it wouldn't make sense to date if I'm leaving, but he could go for some friendship. So I said fine.But when I'd say I would like to do X, he'd just say he's too tired.Then I told him it wasn't working out, sorry. He said to me that he's sorry, but he still very much wants to hang. I then said that lately I've had some more time on my hands, but I'd just go do more work and busy myself. And he said that basically he'd be willing to take some of that time off of my hands and to reach out to him, but he's just not available "all the time." So fine, I said.Fast forward to a few days later, I said I would be willing to go for a hike on the weekend, and no response. I frankly feel I'm being led on as a backup option in case he's super bored and some chick doesn't want him atm.I wonder what I should say to him, I just feel like being really frank with him. I'm leaving I feel like I have nothing to lose in a way since I'm going out of town long-term.

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