/u/Thornescape on So...am I ace
Asexuality is very specifically about not experiencing sexual attraction towards others. That's the entire deal. If you don't experience sexual attraction towards others, you're asexual. It's not all that complicated, really. It doesn't matter why. Could be trauma, hormones, or you were just always that way. Cause is irrelevant to the label.
Asexuality has nothing to do with: romantic attraction, kissing, cuddling, gender preferences, masturbation, porn, kinks, or actually having sex. It's just about sexual attraction towards others. Some sex repulsed asexuals will use porn or masturbate even though they'd have no interest in the real thing, because with fantasy you can skip the stuff you wouldn't like in reality.
The asexual spectrum basically sort of goes
--- Sex Repulsed: Usually avoid sex ---
#1: Repulsed by comments about sex or others having sex
#2: Repulsed by the reality of having sex personally
#3: Willing to have sex, but may be disgusted afterwards
-- Sex Neutral or Positive: May enjoy sex ----
#4: Neutral towards sex, but no sexual attraction
#5: Enjoy pleasing partner, but no sexual attraction
--- Exceptions: Will also be anywhere #1-5 ---
* Grey-asexual: Occasional sexual attraction, but rarely or less.
* Demisexual is entirely different. Demis function like asexuals until they have a particular emotional connection with someone, after which they function like allosexuals with that person.
March 29, 2021 at 11:49PM
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