Frankly, I didn’t know it was hurting me so badly until I had that phone call. I was so repulsed by what I had done that I not only needed to vent about it but also cried for 20 minutes. Literally an 8 second phone call had me in tears. I really need to stop. October 25, 2020 at 11:58PM

GSRM sounds much better and easier to remember than the whole ever increasing acronym for the first letter of every sexuality. October 25, 2020 at 11:55PM

I read through all the comments and it's very mature of you to have apologized for the unnecessary meanness, and I'd just like add my two cents: that discomfort can technically hurt you. Discomfort in and of itself can lead to trauma. I have had a few individuals over the years who have made me uncomfortable by touching me (mostly non-sexually) without my consent. I was not hurt, no one forced themselves on me, I was just made uncomfortable. But now I am very aggressive about not being touched, and I will not touch anyone without specifically being told I'm allowed to at least once because I never want to be the reason someone felt like I did. I was made uncomfortable by years of people trying to coerce me into dating a guy I had no interest in. That discomfort, over the years, damaged my mental health because I was made to feel like I was nothing if I wasn't a potential girlfriend to someone. I was made uncomfortable seeing a crucifix because I was little and thought...

Sure. I hope you find something that works for you. Just be careful out there! People can be real jerks where sex is concerned, and anonymity amplifies that. October 25, 2020 at 11:47PM

Well do you feel like it's helping? It's obviously hurting in some way, and if it isn't helping more than it's hurting then it definitely seems like something you should stop. October 25, 2020 at 11:41PM

Fuck, that’s exactly the word I was looking for. Exposure therapy. Thank you so much. October 25, 2020 at 11:41PM

I get where you're coming from; while I can assure you (from experience) that it is possible to find a partner who doesn't mind forgoing sex - perhaps one who's also asexual - your opportunities are definitely more numerous if you're okay with having sex. That said, I don't know if exposure therapy is likely to make you more okay with having sex. If you go to a psychologist or anything like that, perhaps you could ask for advice on decreasing your sex-repulsed feelings - though I don't know if getting rid of them is actually possible. October 25, 2020 at 11:38PM